Doing a favor without being asked
There are two kinds of helpful people: those who respond when asked, and those who see what is missing before anyone says anything. The second kind is rarer and more precious. This quest invites you to practice it today: doing a favor nobody asked you for.
What it looks like in your day
Unrequested service starts with an attentive eye. During your day, ask yourself: “What does someone around me need, without having said so?” A few examples:
- At home. Emptying the dishwasher when it isn't your turn, preparing the meal, tidying the entryway, doing someone's laundry.
- At work. Refilling the printer paper, tidying the meeting room, proofreading a document for a colleague, offering to take on a thankless task.
- In your building. Picking up trash lying around, carrying a parcel down, holding a door open for someone loaded down.
- At church. Setting up the room, putting away the chairs, welcoming newcomers.
- In your extended family. Calling a grandparent to offer to do their shopping.
The criterion is simple: the service is discreet, useful, and was not requested. Ideally, the person notices without your having to say so.
If you are short on time, choose a five-minute task. If you are shy, favor a silent gesture. If you have little time, observe: you will see that opportunities are not lacking.
What the Bible says
Jesus sets the example of service even in the simplest gestures:
“If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you.”
The Master washes his disciples' feet, a servant's task. Nobody asked him to. He does it because he saw a need (dirty feet after a long walk) and he acted. In Luke's Gospel, he sums up his attitude:
“For whether is greater, he that sitteth at meat, or he that serveth? is not he that sitteth at meat? but I am among you as he that serveth.”
“I am among you as he that serveth”: here is the definition of greatness in the Kingdom. And Mark reports this sentence Jesus says to his disciples (Mark 10:45): the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve.
Pitfalls to avoid
Serving to be noticed. If you arrange for everyone to see your service, you turn it into a showcase. Jesus speaks of discreet service (Matthew 6:3-4).
Imposing your help. An unrequested service is not a forced service. If the person says “No thanks,” respect that.
Turning into a savior. Don't do for others what they can and want to do themselves. First observe what they need.
Serving out of guilt. If you feel obliged to do everything, you will wear yourself out. Choose a gesture you can do with joy.
Neglecting what you are asked to do. It is sometimes easier to launch into a spontaneous service than to honor a boring request. Make sure you do both.
Today, open your eyes. Spot an unspoken need, and do a discreet favor.