Praising in a trial: saying thank you for one thing, in spite of everything

Praising God when everything is going well is easy. But what do you do when the trial is here: grief, illness, unemployment, a breakup, failure? Saying "thank you" can seem indecent. This quest doesn't ask you to deny your pain, nor to give thanks for the trial. It invites you to look for one thing, just one, for which you can thank God in spite of everything.

What it looks like in your day

Say first what is hard. Begin with the truth: "Lord, I'm angry, I'm tired, I don't understand." True praise doesn't go through denial.

Look for one thing. Not ten: just one. What, in this trial, remains given? A person who walks with you, an unexpected strength, a meal, a memory, God's presence itself, an hour of calm.

Say it aloud. "In spite of everything, thank you for my sister who calls me every evening." Or: "In spite of this trial, thank you because you are faithful."

Keep the "in spite of everything." This little phrase saves honesty. You are not saying the trial is good: you are saying God remains good.

Let the praise rise gently. Some days, you won't be able to go further than this one sentence. That is enough.

This practice is not meant to impose joy on you: it is a way of keeping the door open to God, when the pain would like to close it. If the suffering is very intense, talk to a loved one or someone who can accompany you: you don't have to go through this alone.

If you are in a hurry, the sentence "In spite of everything, thank you for..." is enough. If you are shy, you can write it. If you can't manage it, tell God: "I can't today," that is already prayer.

What the Bible says

Job has just lost everything in one day: his possessions, his children. Here is his reaction:

“Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped, And said, Naked came I out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.”

Notice the order: he rends his mantle, shaves his head, falls on the ground. He expresses his pain. And it is in this gesture that he says the Lord gave, the Lord hath taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord. Later in the book, Job will complain, question, protest: praise and lament live side by side. The prophet Habakkuk expresses the same faith in a context of famine:

“Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation.”

The fig tree will not blossom, he says, but he will rejoice in the Lord: he describes the collapse of everything, then in spite of it all chooses joy. His joy doesn't depend on abundance, but on God.

Pitfalls to avoid

Denying the pain. Giving thanks doesn't mean everything is fine. The Bible is full of laments addressed to God. Both have their place.

Imposing gratitude on others. Never say to someone who is suffering: "You should give thanks." This practice is for you, not for correcting others.

Forcing feelings. Praise here is an act, not a state. You may feel nothing.

Looking for a reason for the trial. Giving thanks doesn't mean explaining. You may never know why.

Feeling guilty for not managing it. Some days, the pain is too great. Tell God: "I have no thank-you today." He welcomes that too.

Today, in your current difficulty, look for one thing. Say: "In spite of everything, thank you for..."