Interceding for an opponent: praying for the one who opposes you
Some people oppose you: a competitor, a colleague who runs you down, a neighbor with whom the conflict drags on, a person who criticizes everything you do. Wishing them well feels unnatural. Yet it is what Jesus asks. This quest invites you to name this person before God, and to ask good for them.
What it looks like in your day
This prayer is addressed to an opponent, that is, someone whose actions or words run counter to your interests, your work or your values. Here is how to do it:
- Name them. Say their name to God, just as it is. Don't say "that person."
- Say what you feel, honestly. "Lord, I'm angry with him. He made me lose a project." God already knows. Don't put on an act.
- Ask for good, concretely. Not an abstract blessing: "Give him health, peace in his family, success in what is right." What isn't right, you don't have to bless.
- Ask God to help you behave well, whatever they do.
- Leave justice to God. "I hand over to you what is unjust. It is for you to judge."
Prayer often changes the way you look before it changes the situation. You may see the person differently: tired, frightened, hurt.
If you are in a hurry, one sentence is enough: "Lord, bless [first name]." If you are shy, you can write it. If you feel only anger, begin by telling God about it: a prayer of anger is already a prayer.
What the Bible says
The psalmist, himself surrounded by adversaries, describes a surprising reaction:
“For my love they are my adversaries: but I give myself unto prayer.”
"For my love they are my adversaries: but I give myself unto prayer": faced with hostility, he prays. The book of Proverbs goes further: it calls us to do good concretely:
“If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink: For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the Lord shall reward thee.”
Feeding an enemy who is hungry is the opposite of revenge. And the same book warns against malicious joy: "Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth" (Proverbs 24:17-18). Paul takes up these two ideas in the letter to the Romans (Romans 12:20-21), concluding that we must overcome evil with good.
The story of David and Saul shows a poignant application: David has the opportunity to kill the king who is pursuing him, he spares him (1 Samuel 24:6-7) and leaves justice to God.
Pitfalls to avoid
The prayer as a façade. "Lord, bless him" said through clenched teeth, without thinking, is of little use. Say your real anger instead, then ask for God's help.
The prayer of revenge. "Make him see what he did to me" is not intercession. The psalms sometimes contain such requests, but the New Testament calls us to something else.
Praying instead of speaking. Sometimes the opposition calls for a conversation. Prayer can prepare a meeting, not replace it.
Forgetting to protect yourself. Praying for someone who harms you doesn't stop you from setting limits, reporting abuse or seeking advice.
Thinking you are better. Remember that you too can be someone's opponent. That makes prayer more humble.
Today, name an opponent before God. Say what you feel, then ask him for good for this person.